Tag Archives: parents

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-06-11

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  • Putting out an APB on both Donna Howard & Ron Sprowl, last seen (as far as I know) in knoxville, tn. Any info would be appreciated. Thanks #
  • If parents spent time raising THEIR kids instead of deciding what’s bad for MINE, nobody’d be as screwed up as Rihanna http://t.co/Ft917M8 #
  • FL Woman Attacks Roommate With Butter // The assault with butter charge won’t stick. http://t.co/Kwn2ofd #
  • 8th Grade Field Trip Stops for Lunch at Hooters // So what? We had a Scared Straight program at our school, too. http://t.co/BeyhcXP #
  • Simon Cowell Becomes Bad Botox Victim// we need something to inject into people to make their personalities less ugly http://t.co/vwXuTBo #
  • USDA Unveils New ‘MyPlate’ Dietary Diagram // a plate? they should’ve made one in the shape of a fast food bag http://t.co/isBybrB #
  • Before Japan is allowed to build the Death Star, I want my own working lightsaber, an X-wing fighter and a wookie. http://t.co/MQZfRYw #

  • I was at the @RealTracyMorgan show at @TheRyman in Nashville.. I was not “offended.” I knew what kind of music the band played b4 I went. #

  • way to be a bummer, dead lady at @Bonnaroo. #
  • they found the dead lady at @Bonnaroo when the foul stench in the air started smelling less and less of body odor and patchouli. #
  • will do //RT @tnlife Would you be willing to share your perspective on the Tracy Morgan show w/ us? Shoot an email to jbliss@tennessean.com in reply to tnlife #
  • Reaction to @RealTracyMorgan’s homophobic rant & the backlash that followed http://t.co/XBAl0qh @nsup @Tennessean #
  • ha ha! @Tennessean *almost* spelled my name right: http://t.co/Sk6DUmT #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2010-04-17

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  • RT @RobHaynes: No one loves me neither do i you get what you give and I give goodbye // nonsense, I love you, Hotsauce.. (in the mouth!) #
  • I told my 6-year old, “Be happy with what you have.” Callia said, “I am.. but I want more happiness in my life.” #
  • If you’re within an 11 hour drive of Nashville, GET IN THE CAR! GO GO GO! http://ping.fm/TQq3M #
  • In the mothership, on my way to Asheville, NC to see George Clinton and the Parliament-Funkadelic All Stars. A toast to The Booty! Do that. #
  • Maggot brain #
  • @superpixels I dunno how awesome I am, but I AM full of awesome Dead End BBQ (Knoxville TN) they are awesome http://www.deadendbbq.com plug! #
  • This is a strong contender for my next cd cover.. http://twitpic.com/1ftyk1 #
  • did I miss the window of opportunity to make incredibly stupid “release the kraken” dick jokes? how long can I look forward to hearing more? #
  • RT @starbucks: Today! Bring in a reusable travel mug and we’ll fill it with brewed coffee for free. // dammit, @reppocs has mine hostage #
  • Happy Chad Riden’s Birthday to you, too! 35 years and 9 months ago my parents totally did it. #
  • RT @spokluda Did you hear? @SarahKSilverman is on @Nightline Friday night with @BillWeirABC http://bit.ly/bSzoOu pass it on…#SaveSarahNow #
  • RT @micahwhite @ChadRiden Happy birthday. Congrats to the mailman, as well. Oh, you didn’t — oh, this is awkward // we had a mailLADY..Mom? #
  • I might set up a bot that auto-updates my status at least once every day with “frustrated by these morons.” #
  • RT @reppocs: @ChadRiden I’m holding the mug hostage until you write a new joke. // BOO! I did 5 new jokes at your show monday, jackass! #
  • RT @reppocs: @ChadRiden What have you done for me lately? // UH, I said “nice” things about you for about 35 seconds on @mostlycomedy #
  • RT @bdonahueweedman: @ChadRiden HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHAD! // Thanks for helping make it happier! #
  • RT @MoAlexander Jam bands suck. That is all. // does p-funk count as a jam band!? Named my kid aquaboogie and everythang. #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2010-04-03

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  • Today is my parents 40th wedding anniversary, apparently. I had no idea.. It’s not MY marriage. #
  • Watching the first episode of Knight Rider. Netflix on the Wii is awesomer than I thought it would be. Good job, guys. #
  • 5 gallon bucket of Chad Riden's muskFYI, my musk is for sale on http://www.ChadRiden.com in quantities ranging from 8oz bottles to 5 gallon buckets. Enjoy. #
  • The only way Ricky Martin could possibly have been more obviously gay over all these years is if he were a Republican congressman. #
  • bored. looking to start a twitter fight with someone. who wants to throw down? #
  • @reppocs always smells like Cheetos and lotion // RT @reppocs: @ChadRiden You’re pretty stupid, Chad. // nuh-uh! in reply to reppocs #
  • @reppocs sorry if I missed any zingers from you this afternoon. like the rest of the world, I wasn’t paying attention to anything you say. #
  • I know font snobs will throw a fit, but can someone rationally explain to me exactly what is so bad about Comic Sans? #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-10-31

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  • Good point! I’ll write a show for my new character “Wacky McHacky” // RT @Kerry_White You need puppets and/or other comics’ material. Both? #
  • Just realized the comedy world and I have an abusive relationship. I imagine Lady Comedy crying to the cops, “but I loooovvvve himmm!” #
  • How in the world did MC Hammer go broke? Oh yeah.. http://bit.ly/zyEQ3 #
  • I don’t have a problem w/ Dunham I just hate his show // RT @Gabe138 no problems with Jeff Dunham, but Mencia’s and unfunny joke thief. #
  • I think the real swine flu National Emergency is that we HAVE a vaccine for it, but people are scared to get it. (?!?) #
  • Incredibly stupid, gullible, crappy parents outraged that “Baby Einstein” videos are not even slightly educational: http://adjix.com/n2i5 #
  • WHAT!? You’re telling me actual interaction with a child is better than plopping them down in front of a completely retarded video? Get out. #
  • another newsflash: When you talk baby talk to your child, you’re teaching them to talk like a baby. That’s why your 6 yr old sounds 3. #
  • I’m so hateful. “Hey parents! Your kids are stupid because you’re stupid. (sfx: fart)” #
  • Also, the soul patch is DONE. // RT @JoeNarvaez When are dudes with goatees going to realize they are stuck in the mid 90s? #
  • @JDFelip Man says, “You have to book my familys act. It’s incredible! We rape the audience!” “What do you call yourselves?” The Aristocrats! #
  • @lgu I’ve tried to bake a decent loaf of bread many, many times using many, many recipes & end up with nothing but bricks. WTF am I missing? #
  • A booker asked how clean I can be. I told him my range goes from “my 92 year old Lutheran grandma from ND is in the front row” to.. #
  • .. “the still-sticky stripper pole is the cleanest thing on the stage.” Will I get booked? Guess again. #
  • Now that I think of it I’m not exactly sure how old grandma actually is, so that may not be completely true. #
  • Grandma & my mom curse, but they do it like this: horse-feathers! fish sticks! for Pete’s sake! I tell ‘em God knows what they really mean. #
  • Whenever poker comes on tv I think “OH SHIT, did I just watch Carson Daly?!” #
  • I saw a website that sells chocolate covered bacon. Sorry boys, no sales from me. I think I’ve figured out the secret recipe: choc. + bacon? #
  • bake or fry your bacon. melt chocolate chips. run bacon thru the choc., chill it in the fridge for a few. could be the greatest thing ever. #
  • WTF, everybody? C’mon now.. #
  • If there’s any one thing idiotic loudmouth dildos love, it’s other idiotic loudmouth dildos. #
  • I got to see Kevin Nealon wed, Lewis Black last night, the Music City Bar & Grill show tonight, Satan Day tomorrow.. it’s been a fun week. #

Found in my parents house: Lucky Jesus Cross

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Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

Don't put all your eggs in one basket.

I guess it makes sense?

If one good luck charm doesn’t work out the way they planned, hopefully the other will save the day, right?

I don’t know where you buy one of these but I’ll bet somebody got rich selling them. I wonder what they credit more for their success? Luck? Jesus? The fusion of both made their dreams come true. May we all be so lucky / blessed.