Tag Archives: lee greenwood

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-05-07

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  • The rain in Milwaukee smells like a wet hamster. A drunk, wet hamster. #
  • Dan Whitehurst and I just swerved to miss a black bear in the road! about 30 minutes south of Harris, MI. #
  • RT @KatrinaLColeman:”Surely you stopped and gave @bradbradbrad a ride.” // nope! He was 780 miles out of our way. Sorry Capital B. in reply to KatrinaLColeman #
  • RT @KatrinaLColeman:”Surely you stopped and gave @bradbradbrad a ride.” // OH! You were referring to how Brad is a fat, hairy gay man. #
  • I think this AM radio host just round-about accused @BarackObama of being on “Colored People Time.” #
  • Time to chime in, Everybody. #
  • Every soldier on that Bin Laden mission is an instant hero. Book deals, movies, free BJs for life – for every one of em. #

  • Lee Greenwood’s rotary landline phone is ringing off the hook. #

  • Water cooler office funny guys around the world are cracking their knuckles. My mom is FWD’ing Jesus-themed chainletters as fast as she can. #
  • Thousands of @cafePress shop owners are furiously Photoshopping infinite variations of the same three Osama Bin Laden jokes. #
  • At every truck stop I’ve been in today, I’ve been dying to scream out, “Osama Yo Momma!” just so I could count the high fives. #
  • mentally making lemonade #
  • I’m doing a short guest set on this: //RT @BillyWayneDavis Tonight @gobananascomedy in Cincinnati Kooks w @rysing @tomsimmonscomedy and me in reply to BillyWayneDavis #
  • RT @superpixels “You fuckers bragging about inbox zero?..” // I’m more productive than all of you with my inbox 16,825. http://t.co/7Un8Xd0 in reply to superpixels #
  • Please don’t compliment me when I’m drunk – I’ll give you my “how dare you like me!” speech. #
  • I really wish Sober Chad had no knowledge of Drunk Chad and vice versa. Each me only uses that info to hurt the other. #

  • Travel tip: in a pinch, toenail clippers are a handy & terrible way to trim your mustache. #

Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-12-12

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  • Washing and drying a few loads of snuggies, slankets and bariatric slipper socks. #
  • RT @toddbarry: My favorite part of getting the Sunday NY times: throwing out the Sports section. #
  • “Osama Bin Laden has never touched a dime of his Al Qaeda money, living entirely off of his stand-up income.” Late Show fun fact 10/9/2009 #
  • RT @Anundson: Chad Riden and Jesse Perry live in studio on Tues Dec 8th 8-9am WRVU 91.1. The final Get Up Stand Up! streaming @ wrvu.org #
  • #CHADRIDEN1K started on Oct. 8 with 388 followers. I’m now at 414. I’m starting to think we’re not on track to hit 1,000 by NYE, everybody. #
  • Remember my pledge to donate ONE THOUSAND pennies to charity if I get 1,000 followers by the end of 2009!? C’mon, Twitter.. where’s your <3? #
  • IT’S FOR CHARITY, people. Surely we can find 586 twitter users who like random, passive-agressive jackassery? Tell a friend: #CHADRIDEN1K #
  • Uh, oh. I’m getting all retrospective-y on 2009.. I only kinda remember what I did this year, so I’ll mark it down as a success. #
  • In 2010, I’ll continue my quest for more & better quality of everything, but will settle for whatever and be satisfied with none of it. #
  • Callia and I tastefully decorated the house last night. My lovely wifera just said, “it looks like Christmas threw up in here.” #
  • Woke up thinking WWJD?, so we’re sitting around the fireplace drinking whiskey & singing ironically anti-semitic lyrics to Christmas tunes. #
  • Endorsement – Dr. Bamford’s NO SOAP™ http://ping.fm/ESu0h #
  • RT @Anundson was just informed I am not welcome back on WRVU, seven hours after I announced I wouldn’t be back. another bridge burned #wrvu #
  • Jim Hayes, Assistant Director of Student Media/Broadcasting at Vanderbilt University, is a giant dildo. (it’s not libel if it’s true!) #wrvu #
  • Once again, telling Callia that old story about the time I got into a gunfight with Santa Claus. (Don’t hate on me, he started it.) #
  • actually it was TG2:EB2: Electric Boogaloo’er! // RT @themightychuck @GeoffBreedwell Chad just celebrated Thanksgiving 2 Electric Boogaloo #
  • Dear Internet, could I please have more shitty Tiger Woods jokes? I can’t get enough of ‘em! I just know they’ll stand the test of time.. #
  • ha! David Letterman’s first message on twitter: RT @Late_Show Do you smell veal and peppers? // yes, Dave. Yes, I do. #
  • judging from the evidence I’ve gathered in and around my bathroom, last night I brushed my teeth with A+D diaper rash cream. #
  • the anchor on CNN just said, “electriZZZity.” could someone around Atlanta please punch her in the face for me? ty #
  • Callia brought home her first Kwanzaa related school work today. mat? fruit? candles? ears of corn? unity cup? gifts? we’re converting. #
  • Project: Scientology Sucks (a video prank contest) – cash prizes! I want to do this: http://ping.fm/qHrJz #
  • I just try to steal their hearts. // RT @Grimeys: it makes me cry when you steal from us @Grimeys… just so you know (via @NashvilleCream) #
  • I feel sorry for the people who hate the USA but love Lee Greenwood. #